"It makes me puke first, then laughs then kill myself when I see people around me playing the victim card one way or the other. Sometimes on social media, then on Twitter, then on LinkedIn, later on, Instagram and on and on...."
Yes, those were my thoughts couple of years ago...when I did not have a clue why people do the things they do or the way they do it. With time and again + getting older I have realized its no one else's fault if you are not getting the results you want out of life. I used to blame other people and yes I agree we all have influences in our lives and choices we make about giving someone the ability and power to do those things to us.
In hindsight, if you are reading this and struggling with the same. I think following are the reasons why people don't get what they want from their circumstances.
1- Your words don't map to your actions:
People can say all things to themselves, they can tell how awesome and dedicated they are. How other people have played them. They would never go down to admit that their words would never map to their actions. I am a culprit of not going after my word and taking action on it. When our actions start mapping according to what we say to ourselves and what we believe in our heart. Something amazing starts to happen which is called success.
2- Your desire to have Downward and Upward social comparison:
Ever wondered why people like reality TV and movies? It could be a number of factors escapism, time pass, food for thought etc. One of the reason is as psychologists say we like to have a downward social comparison when people do bad things or make mistakes and we conveniently tell ourselves, " Oh that is so dumb. I would never do that etc. etc. ". It is easy to feel bad for someone in other parts of the world and criticize the politicians or the system, as its all very convenient to Tweet about it. But the question we should ask ourselves is. Am I ready to be in the shoes of this leader or this president etc?
3- Your Definition of Love
A lot of people complain about not getting the results they want to have in their love life. When you ask them to define love. They are speechless because they don't know. They just want to follow the crowds with herd mentality and feel better in society.
If your definition of love is.
Love = Desire of being desirable?
You are doing it all wrong. It's easy to get influenced by movies such as NoteBook or all the escapism and Titanic romance which is sold in the world. If that's what anyone wants to do with their that's great. All good for them.
However, when the same person gets up so wrapped in their claim that they love someone no matter what and ends up treason them. They even attempt all kinds of defaming or punishing tactics to people they claim they love when they don't achieve worldly success as they have seen in movies. in eyes of the world. The reality and real motive of their influence and fluffy ideals in life become evident.
4- You think your current circumstances are not favorable to you
I don't feel there is a need to explain point # 4. However, the above views are a reinforcement for me to analyze my own behavior. Map my actions to my words and not to complain. That is the only way to improve oneself and go-forward. We live in a world where ambitions are given much more respect and weight than the results and real execution. However the later is the real truth which bring results.
Yes, those were my thoughts couple of years ago...when I did not have a clue why people do the things they do or the way they do it. With time and again + getting older I have realized its no one else's fault if you are not getting the results you want out of life. I used to blame other people and yes I agree we all have influences in our lives and choices we make about giving someone the ability and power to do those things to us.
In hindsight, if you are reading this and struggling with the same. I think following are the reasons why people don't get what they want from their circumstances.
1- Your words don't map to your actions:
People can say all things to themselves, they can tell how awesome and dedicated they are. How other people have played them. They would never go down to admit that their words would never map to their actions. I am a culprit of not going after my word and taking action on it. When our actions start mapping according to what we say to ourselves and what we believe in our heart. Something amazing starts to happen which is called success.
2- Your desire to have Downward and Upward social comparison:
Ever wondered why people like reality TV and movies? It could be a number of factors escapism, time pass, food for thought etc. One of the reason is as psychologists say we like to have a downward social comparison when people do bad things or make mistakes and we conveniently tell ourselves, " Oh that is so dumb. I would never do that etc. etc. ". It is easy to feel bad for someone in other parts of the world and criticize the politicians or the system, as its all very convenient to Tweet about it. But the question we should ask ourselves is. Am I ready to be in the shoes of this leader or this president etc?
3- Your Definition of Love
A lot of people complain about not getting the results they want to have in their love life. When you ask them to define love. They are speechless because they don't know. They just want to follow the crowds with herd mentality and feel better in society.
If your definition of love is.
Love = Desire of being desirable?
You are doing it all wrong. It's easy to get influenced by movies such as NoteBook or all the escapism and Titanic romance which is sold in the world. If that's what anyone wants to do with their that's great. All good for them.
However, when the same person gets up so wrapped in their claim that they love someone no matter what and ends up treason them. They even attempt all kinds of defaming or punishing tactics to people they claim they love when they don't achieve worldly success as they have seen in movies. in eyes of the world. The reality and real motive of their influence and fluffy ideals in life become evident.
4- You think your current circumstances are not favorable to you
I don't feel there is a need to explain point # 4. However, the above views are a reinforcement for me to analyze my own behavior. Map my actions to my words and not to complain. That is the only way to improve oneself and go-forward. We live in a world where ambitions are given much more respect and weight than the results and real execution. However the later is the real truth which bring results.
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